No Gain without Pain!
We all know that there is "no gain without pain." Whether we are trying to parent a child, lose weight, develop a new skill, put on a new grace, put off an old besetting sin - no advance can be made without both negatives and positives in the mix.
Learning a new language requires hours learning both grammar and vocabulary. A boxer friend of mine once told me that he hated - the very word he used! - the rigour of training: it was pure grind and the mere thought of yet another round of physical training was distasteful to his mind.
Before Nehemiah and his people could rebuild the walls of Jerusalem they first had to clear away the rubble. Negative and postive.
Negative before positive.
There are no gains without pains.
Blessed is the one
who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked
or stand in the way of sinners
or sit in the seat of mockers...
Three Blessed Negatives
If we want to enjoy a blessed life, says the psalmist, it starts with three negatives. All three negatives can be summarised as one: stay away from sinful influences. The Hebrew poet may have simply tripled one thought for emphasis, but I think we can also see a development in holiness over the three words, Walk, Stand and Sit.
"Walk in the counsel of the wicked." The first blessed negative is to avoid the advice of unbelievers.
"Stand in the way of sinners." The second blessed negative is to avoid hanging out with unbelievers.
"Sit in the seat of mockers." The third blessed negative is to avoid their deep cynical fellowship.
Let's take away two thoughts from these blessed negatives - and let's remember that blessedness is their purpose.
People Influence Us
People influence us more than anything else. That's a given from Psalm 1. It is also a given in the ministry of Jesus. He influenced the Twelve - how? By spending time with them. (He also protected them from the negative influences of the Pharisees - "beware of the yeast of the Pharisess...") Critics who did not like the profound influence of Jesus on the disciples nevertheless were forced to acknowledge that these men had spent time with Christ.
People may influence us directly by fellowship with them, or they may influence us indirectly by the things they write or say or produce.
To live a holy life we must avoid being deeply influenced by the unbelieving people of the world. It's old-fashioned holiness.
Our best friends should never be unbelievers. Across every close friendship evil can pass "under the radar." In our desire to please an unbelieving friend we may do things that we would not otherwise dream of doing - because we love them.
That is why the Lord forbad his people to marry outside of Israel. Once in the marriage relationship, the spouse may ask for an idol to be set up in the home, for example, and to avoid conflict or out of love, the ugly lie (another Old Testament word for an idol) would appear.
Paul encourages us not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. A yoke is any strong bond between two people, whether a deep friendship, a business partnership, or a marriage.
Here is his holy reasoning from 2 Corinthians 6
"Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?
In none of the most significant areas of your new life in Christ do you have anything in common with an unbeliever. One loves wickedness, the other righteousness; one is in the dark, the other in the light; one follows Satan, the other follows Christ; one does not believe, the other believes; one worships idols, the other one is a temple of God's Spirit.
There can be no genuine blessedness without a rejection of the influence of unbelievers, whose whole minds, words and lives are sinful.
I have tragically come across parents who have sought to overlook, or worse to justify, the relationship of a believing daughter or son with an unbeliever saying, "But she is such a nice girl / he's such a nice guy." The actual truth of the matter is that nice fiance is in a very different kingdom.
You're gonna have to serve somebody, yes
Indeed you're gonna have to serve somebody
Well, it may be the devil or it may be the Lord
But you're gonna have to serve somebody
Indeed you're gonna have to serve somebody
Well, it may be the devil or it may be the Lord
But you're gonna have to serve somebody
Sin is Progressive
The second thought that emerges from verse one is this: sin is progressive, sin advances, sin is always moving forward (I mean, of course, backwards).
Walk, Stand, Sit.
Imagine the scene. We start walking along the road with someone, we chat and become friends. Soon we are standing for long hours "chewing the rag", and soon we sit with them over a meal. There is a progression here,
Walk, Stand, Sit.
Sin is like that, whether it is a friendship with an unbeliever, or a sin that has begun to grow unchecked in our hearts. Sin doesn't stand still. Sin advances.
You've heard the Jungle Doctor story for kids? Village boy finds orphaned leopard and brings it home to mother. "Mama I want to keep this cat, it's just so cute." Wise mom does not allow it, for, she says, "little leopards turn into big leopards and big leopards kill."
Little sins, turn into big sins, and big sins kill.
Summing it All Up
How shall we respond to God's Holy Word today?
First, if we want to be truly blessed, we must watch all our friendships. Who are our best friends? Our best friends should all be followers of Jesus Christ.
Is there a friendship with an unbeliever developing in your life? Do you need to watch it?
Who are your best friends?
When we are seeking a marriage partner, the first consideration must be "Are they followers of Jesus?"
But, you say, what if a believer is married to an unbeliever? In those cases, unless the unbeliever voluntarily leaves, the believer is bound to continue in the marriage - as difficult as that so often is; our enemies, warned Jesus, may be members of our own household. (Matthew 10:36) It can be a difficult cross to bear.
And someone else says, what about our responsibility to win unbelievers to Christ? Don't we have to become like Jesus who was the friend of sinners? We do, but the arrow of influence is purposely and carefully one way. We go into those friendships aware of the potential perils and we develop those relationships to win them.
Jesus never allowed the sinners who loved him to pull him down. He, instead, pulled them up.
Second, we watch all our media intake - by media I mean everything from books to Instagram, from Netflix to YouTube, from Spotify to Facebook.
Although born again by the Holy Spirit, we are aware that we have an old sinful nature that can so easily be awakened. The Puritans, for whom holiness was a big Priority, used to liken that sinful nature to a tinder box. One tiny spark of temptation is enough to explode our hearts into a fireball of sin.
When I was a teenager, my father constantly bemoaned the way his six children listened so much to worldly music (Harry Chapin, Pink Floyd, et al). By contrast to today's 24/7 Spotify consumption, the influence on us back then was pretty minimal. But dad was concerned that ungodly words would sink deep into our souls and drive us from God's Word and ultimately drive us from God Himself.
That old-fashioned avoidance of worldliness has sadly disappeared from among us.
Tomorrow, God-willing, we go positive and learn the spring of all true blessedness - to be soaked in God's Word.
But let us all allow God's blessed negatives to sink deep into out souls.
A SONG FOR THE DAY
We remind ourselves today that becoming holy is to become like God, "be holy for I am holy." (1 Peter 1:16) A well-loved hymn with a modern twist.
Holy holy holy Lord God almighty
Early in the morning
Our song shall rise to Thee
Holy holy holy merciful and mighty
God in three persons
Blessed Trinity
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